For you

Hello Monsieur F! ^^

how are you today? i hope you're fine as you are everyday ^^
i'm fine too ^^
you had a internet problem in your flat, so you can't connect today.
i'm a little bit frustrated not being able to talk to you. ^^
i always feel sad easily during nights, especially when you can't talk to me on the msn.
i'm listening "oh, laura"'s album, i found their music very attractive these days.
i told you about them before i think ^^
i'm typing things here, i don't expect you to see this since i've never told you about this blog.

you told me that you were in the library using the internet yesterday.
i felt warm on hearing it, though i know possibly it's not for talking to me on the msn, i was still very happy.because at least i can talk with you.
maybe you don't know, but leaving messages and waiting your connecting make me wanna cry at times.
i don't know why but i do cry sometimes.
i think i might be dropping tears for my life.
i'm not used to say things about love, and i'm not good at expressing it as well.
but i always want to say i love you, i want to do so so much..but when thinking that i'm just someone on the msn in your life, i felt frustrated.
though i know you talk to me every day, leaving me messages, or even sending me a sms across the big european and asian continent, and cards and gifts.
i really shouldn't ask more.

i don't want myself to be so much in love with you, at least not before we meet in real life.
but i can't control myself, i'm thinking of you even during the day time.
i'm afraid that it's only a dream in the end, maybe you don't really feel that way to me.
i'm afraid that i'll love you too deeply, and you don't love me back.
i've never met somebody like you, you're too nice to me and which makes me greedy and want more.

i want to see you connected on msn right now so badly... i feel so lonely.


                                                                                                                                        Mai 05/04/2012